I truly think that without the internet, I wouldn't find myself intertwined with celebrity crushes. Even the most unrealistic options become suddenly available to explore with the imagination as soon as a simple page search results in option after option; all mind-numbing photos and information about someone who somehow feels relevant in your life with absolutely no intentional connections.


So far this new year has brought me nothing but intense pain, thanks to mother nature. She always has my favorite timing. Unfortunately this means I completely lack the capacity to contain full moral compassion, as I usually would towards anyone and everyone in my life. As of now though, all I'm able to focus on truly are the grinding pains in my midsection along with the intense feeling of emptiness from the striking memories of this time of year one year ago, and my mother's last short conversation we had before she left the house for the last time; in an ambulance.